On Sunday, November 4th at 2 a.m., Daylight Saving Time ends in the United States. This year, Daylight Saving Time is four weeks longer than last year with the passage of the Energy Policy Act in 2005. So each fall we move our clocks back and "gain" an extra hour.
Also, this Sunday Nov. 4th is the NY Marathon. Anybody going out to watch????
Tuesday, October 30, 2007
Tuesday, October 16, 2007
BIRTHDAY BOY
YES WE HAVE IN OUR MIDST A BIRTHDAY BOY RICK HAS A BIRTHDAY COMING UP THE DATE IS OCTOBER 18TH WE WILL BE CELEBRATING HIS BIRTHDAY ON OCTOBER 19TH AT 8 PM AT OUTBACK STEAKHOUSE AT 8PM LOCATED IN LOVELY BENSONHURST BROOKLYN 15TH AVE AND 86TH STREET COME ONE COME ALL BRING YOUR OWN PARTY HATS AND NOISE MAKERS . LET'S HAVE A BLAST FOR HIS BIRTHDAY!!!!
IF YOUR LOOKING TO GET RICK A PRESENT ANYONE WHO KNOW'S WHERE HE CAN GET SOME "MAN ASS" PLEASE LET HIM KNOW. IF ANYONE WOULD LIKE TO CHIP IN ON SOME "MAN ASS" FOR RICK PLEASE EMAIL ME WITH YOUR DONATIONS !!!
THANK YOU THIS IS A RECORDED ANNOUNCEMENT!!!
IF YOUR LOOKING TO GET RICK A PRESENT ANYONE WHO KNOW'S WHERE HE CAN GET SOME "MAN ASS" PLEASE LET HIM KNOW. IF ANYONE WOULD LIKE TO CHIP IN ON SOME "MAN ASS" FOR RICK PLEASE EMAIL ME WITH YOUR DONATIONS !!!
THANK YOU THIS IS A RECORDED ANNOUNCEMENT!!!
Friday, October 12, 2007
Oh that Ellen!
Dear Tide
I am writing to say what an excellent product you have! I've used itall of my married life, as my Mom always told me it was the best. Now that I am in my fifties I find it even better! In fact, about a month ago, I spilled some red wine on my new white blouse. My inconsiderate and uncaring husband started to belittle me about how clumsy I was, and generally started becoming a pain in the neck. One thing led to another and somehow I ended up with his blood on my new white blouse! I grabbed my bottle of Tide with bleach alternative, and to my surprise and satisfaction, all of the stains came out! In fact, the stains came out so well the detectives who came by yesterday told me that the DNA tests on my blouse were negative and then my attorney called and said that I was no longer considered a suspect in the disappearance of my husband. What a relief! Going through menopause is bad enough without being a murder suspect! I thank you, once again, for having a great product.Well, gotta go, have to write to the Hefty bag people.
I am writing to say what an excellent product you have! I've used itall of my married life, as my Mom always told me it was the best. Now that I am in my fifties I find it even better! In fact, about a month ago, I spilled some red wine on my new white blouse. My inconsiderate and uncaring husband started to belittle me about how clumsy I was, and generally started becoming a pain in the neck. One thing led to another and somehow I ended up with his blood on my new white blouse! I grabbed my bottle of Tide with bleach alternative, and to my surprise and satisfaction, all of the stains came out! In fact, the stains came out so well the detectives who came by yesterday told me that the DNA tests on my blouse were negative and then my attorney called and said that I was no longer considered a suspect in the disappearance of my husband. What a relief! Going through menopause is bad enough without being a murder suspect! I thank you, once again, for having a great product.Well, gotta go, have to write to the Hefty bag people.
Wednesday, October 10, 2007
THINK TEST
You have to try this....I got 17.....
Try your luck to check your power of observation.
Just click on "A Think Test" below:
A Think Test
Try your luck to check your power of observation.
Just click on "A Think Test" below:
A Think Test
Joke of the week
(1)YOU REALLY HAVE TO READ THIS OUT LOUD!!!!! This is so funny. TAKE THE TIME you will laugh until you cry. I did. To get the full effect, this should be read aloud.
The following is a telephone exchange between a hotel guest and room-service, at a hotel in Asia, which was recorded and published in the Far East Economic Review:
Room Service (RS): "Morrin. ; Roon sirbees."
Guest (G): "Sorry, I thought I dialed room-service."
RS: "Rye..Roon sirbees..morrin! Jewish to oddor sunteen??"
G: "Uh..yes..I'd like some bacon and eggs."
RS: "Ow July den?"
G: "What??"
RS: "Ow July den?...pryed, boyud, poochd?"
G : "Oh, the eggs! How do I like them? Sorry, scrambled please."
RS: "Ow July dee baykem? ! ;Crease?"
G: "Crisp will be fine."
RS : "Hokay. An Sahn toes?"
G: "What?"
RS:"An toes. July Sahn toes?"
G: "I don't think so."
RS: "No? Judo wan sahn toes??"
G: "I feel really bad about this, but I don't know what 'judo wan sahn toes' means."
RS: "Toes! toes!...Why jew don juan toes? Ow bow Anglish moppin we bodder?"
G: "English muffin!! I've got it! You were saying 'Toast.' Fine. Yes, an English muffin will be fine."
RS: "We bodder?"
G: "No...just put the bodder on the side."
RS: "Wad! ?"
G: "I mean butter...just put it on the side."
RS: "Copy?"
G: "Excuse me?"
RS: "Copy...tea...meel?"
G: "Yes. Coffee, please, and that's all."
RS: "One Minnie. Scramah egg, crease baykem, Anglish moppin we bodder on sigh and copy....rye??"
G: "Whatever you say."
RS: "Tenjewberrymuds."
G : "You're very welcome."
(2) Subject: A Short Story. A college class was told they had to write a short story in as few words as possible. The instructions were that the short story had to contain the following three things:
(1) Religion
(2) Sexuality
(3) Mystery
Below is the only A+ paper in the class.
Good God, I'm pregnant, I wonder who the father is."
The following is a telephone exchange between a hotel guest and room-service, at a hotel in Asia, which was recorded and published in the Far East Economic Review:
Room Service (RS): "Morrin. ; Roon sirbees."
Guest (G): "Sorry, I thought I dialed room-service."
RS: "Rye..Roon sirbees..morrin! Jewish to oddor sunteen??"
G: "Uh..yes..I'd like some bacon and eggs."
RS: "Ow July den?"
G: "What??"
RS: "Ow July den?...pryed, boyud, poochd?"
G : "Oh, the eggs! How do I like them? Sorry, scrambled please."
RS: "Ow July dee baykem? ! ;Crease?"
G: "Crisp will be fine."
RS : "Hokay. An Sahn toes?"
G: "What?"
RS:"An toes. July Sahn toes?"
G: "I don't think so."
RS: "No? Judo wan sahn toes??"
G: "I feel really bad about this, but I don't know what 'judo wan sahn toes' means."
RS: "Toes! toes!...Why jew don juan toes? Ow bow Anglish moppin we bodder?"
G: "English muffin!! I've got it! You were saying 'Toast.' Fine. Yes, an English muffin will be fine."
RS: "We bodder?"
G: "No...just put the bodder on the side."
RS: "Wad! ?"
G: "I mean butter...just put it on the side."
RS: "Copy?"
G: "Excuse me?"
RS: "Copy...tea...meel?"
G: "Yes. Coffee, please, and that's all."
RS: "One Minnie. Scramah egg, crease baykem, Anglish moppin we bodder on sigh and copy....rye??"
G: "Whatever you say."
RS: "Tenjewberrymuds."
G : "You're very welcome."
(2) Subject: A Short Story. A college class was told they had to write a short story in as few words as possible. The instructions were that the short story had to contain the following three things:
(1) Religion
(2) Sexuality
(3) Mystery
Below is the only A+ paper in the class.
Good God, I'm pregnant, I wonder who the father is."
The Perils of Paul ( A Halloween Ghost Story )
This happened a while ago in Brooklyn, and even though it sounds like an Alfred Hitchcock tale, it's true. Paul, a husband and father of two, was on the side of the road hitch hiking on a very dark night in the midst of a storm. The night was rolling on and no car went by. The storm was so strong he could hardly see a few feet ahead of him. Suddenly he saw a car slowly coming towards him and stopped. Paul, desperate for shelter and without thinking about it, got in the car and closed the door, just to realize there was nobody behind the wheel and the engine wasn't on! The car started moving slowly. Paul, looked at the road and saw a curve approaching. Scared, he started to pray, begging for his life.
Then, just before he hit the curve, a hand appeared through the window and turned the wheel. Paul, paralysed with terror, watched how the hand appeared every time they came to a curve. Paul saw the lights of a bar down the road so, gathering strength, jumped out of the car and ran to it. Wet and out of breath, he rushed inside and asked for two shots of tequila. He then started telling everybody about the horrible experience he went through. A silence enveloped everybody when they realized he was crying and.... wasn't drunk. About 15 minutes later, two guys walked into the same pub. They were also wet and out of breath. Looking around and seeing Paul sobbing at the bar, one said to the other, "Look, James. here's the F*#@ing idiot that got in the car while we were pushing it."
Then, just before he hit the curve, a hand appeared through the window and turned the wheel. Paul, paralysed with terror, watched how the hand appeared every time they came to a curve. Paul saw the lights of a bar down the road so, gathering strength, jumped out of the car and ran to it. Wet and out of breath, he rushed inside and asked for two shots of tequila. He then started telling everybody about the horrible experience he went through. A silence enveloped everybody when they realized he was crying and.... wasn't drunk. About 15 minutes later, two guys walked into the same pub. They were also wet and out of breath. Looking around and seeing Paul sobbing at the bar, one said to the other, "Look, James. here's the F*#@ing idiot that got in the car while we were pushing it."
The Adventures of Kaz & Ma
Ma feared Kaz wasn't hearing as well as she used to and she thought she might need a hearing aid. Not quite sure how to approach her, she called the family Doctor to discuss the problem.The Doctor told her there is a simple informal test that she could perform to give the Doctor a better idea about her hearing loss. Here's what you do," said the Doctor, "Stand about 40 feet away from her, and in a normal conversational speaking tone see if she hears you. If not, go to 30 feet, then 20 feet, and so on until you get a response."That evening, Kaz is in the kitchen cooking dinner,and she was in the den. she thinks to herself, "I'm about 40 feet away, let's see what happens." Then in a normal tone she asks, "Honey, what's for dinner?" No response. So Ma moves closer to the kitchen, about 30 feet from Kaz and repeats, "Honey, what's for dinner?" Still no response. Next she moves into the dining room where she is about 20 feet from Kaz and asks, "Honey, what's for dinner?" Again he gets no response. So, she walks up to the kitchen door, about 10 feet away. "Honey, what's for dinner?" Again there is no response. So she walks right up behind her. "Honey, what's for dinner?"
"MA FOR THE FIFTH, F*#@ing , TIME CHICKEN!"
"MA FOR THE FIFTH, F*#@ing , TIME CHICKEN!"
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